GOOD JOB AMERICA

Well done stupid fat Americans,

My reverse psychology clearly worked and helped Barack Obama win! I think most of his victory is due to my amazing psychological skills. Hopefully, President Obama will get Egypt-US relations back on track after a rough 8 years.

James Lunch out.

GO JOHN MCCAIN!

Hi Friends

Sorry its been so Long since my last post, but I have become disillusioned with the internet and sold my computer not long after my last post. but I decided to get a computer and log back on to see whats happening. You may be surprised to learn that I have changed my views. I now think George W Bush is a great man and a great president who has done much for Egypt and the rest of the world.

Here in Egypt, we don't hear much about the Yankee elections. But from what I hear John McCain is the clear choice for President.

He is much more friendly to oil producing countries such as ourselves. He will do the war against the Iraqis much better than Barrack Obama can.

Vote for John McCain, stupid fat Americans.

Oh, I have some suggestions for voting in your crazy elections system this year.

1. Vote for John McCain
2. If you see someone trying to get support for Barrack Obama, try and pressure them into supporting war hero John McCain. Use violence is necessary. It works!
3. Tell all your friends and loved ones to vote for John McCain, or else you will hurt them. This also works on any old persons.
4. On elections day, go out and when you see someone voting for Barrack Obama, beat them, so other people will vote for Johns McCain out of fear. Something your current president knows much about.
5. Once John McCain wins the elections, he should let Egypt be the first company into Iraq for its oil. We need it much more than you stupid fat american pigs. You are too fat already, you dont need any more oil.
6. Once George W. Bush is out of office. Make him a hero. He is already one.

Good luck my friends

Poem

Greetings friends,

Heres a short poem I wrote recently about America. I wrote it whilst listening to my favourite singer, Celine Dion. My poem is titled 'America - Land of Death'.

America - Land of Death

America
Death comes
Red, white, blue
The last colours I see

A bullet Enters
Lungs, leaking, air
I vomit, blood
Onto my shoe

The children, point
Goats, the goats
My precious goats
Who will care for Them

Darkness comes
Like a shadow, creeping
Why God, why
My legs, MY LEGS

Dedicated to all those killed by America's foreign policy.

James Lunch © 2006

Dog Pie

Here are 20 simple ideas to make the US Elections run smoother without such controversy.

A. Hold the elections over five days, thus getting rid of ridiculous lines.
B. Do not get people who are good friends with G. W. Bush to count, tally, organise the voting machines, vote, register voters, etc.
C. Fellate John F. Kerry.
D. Get officials from England to monitor the election.
E. Get a Democratic candidate who does not suck balls.
F. Make the system a lot simpler. Whoever wins Washington DC, wins the election.
G. Only white, conservative people can vote, wait, thats what happens anyway, houua houua houua.
H. Fellate John F. Kerry
I. Bone George Bush's wife.
J. Pour salt in 'Dick' Cheney's urethra.
K. Daryl Harris, need I say more.
L. Get Peter McCaskill to run for President.
M. Moon
N. Beat a squirrel to death with a baseball bat, then send it to the White House.
O. Behead yourself.
P. Smoke a candy blunt before voting.
Q. Kick your neighbours cat in the nuts.
R. Photograph your penis and tape the photo to your forehead.
S. Fellate yourself.
T. Try to see how far you can fit a sausage down your throat, then, photograph your penis and tape the photo to your forehead.

I think these ideas will help.

America sucks

Heres a short list of why america sucks

1.) They elected George Bush
2.) They re-elected George Bush
3.) They attack countries for no reason, kill tens of thousands of people, and say they are 'liberated'.
4.) They are mostly obese.
5.) They torture prisoners.
6.) They think they are being patriotic by voting for bush, when really, they are just being morons with no thought to the rest of the world. Bastards.
7.) They eat canadians.
8.) They elected Arnold Schwartzenegger as a governor OF CALIFORNIA.
9.) They cant catch an old man with a walking stick, yet they can overthrow saddam hussein.
10.) They are just mostly morons, simply look at such people as Julia Roberts, Kid Rock, 'Dick' Cheney, Oprah, and much more.
11.) One of their states is called Wyoming. What kind of word is that, seriously. Why not call it Peopleland. At least that makes sense.
12.) Their government is more corrupt than mexico's.
13.) George Bush sucks peanus.